When Mom Died – Fiction

This is a piece  I’ve written for Flash Fiction For Aspiring Writers – a weekly photo prompt for writers.  Write 100-150 words (give or take 25 words).  The purpose is to have fun while improving our writing skills.  Yay to that and thanks to Priceless Joy for hosting this weekly prompt.  Please drop by to read and/or participate…it’s a great help to many of us to have these sorts of prompts and a great deal of work for the host.  Thank you so much, PJ.

When Mom Died

The day we buried Mom was something love is made of.  I was twelve years old.  Uncle Jim spoke so magically about her. He proclaimed her to be the only woman he’d ever truly loved.

Uncle Jim’s partner was seated beside me. Uncle Karl. He looked down at me uncomfortably. I sensed his gaze and took his hand. I squeezed it tightly and looked up into his face.

Later, at Uncle Jim’s and Uncle Karl’s condo, I approached Uncle Jim.  He looked at me. It must have been the saddest look I’d ever seen cross his face. There were tears on his cheeks. He motioned to Uncle Karl.

“Why don’t I just start calling you Dad?” I asked.

Uncle Jim and Uncle Karl exchanged questioning glances.

“Mom told me right before she died,” I said.

Oh!, What an after party there was then! We were all so carried away by a joyful peace.

Ellespeth

other stories for this prompt

Image Credit: Dawn M. Miller

15 thoughts on “When Mom Died – Fiction

  1. I think you did a really nice job starting this piece off. Right from the first line I knew what the story was about. I liked the relationship between all three characters. And I felt the sadness for their loss. And the look between her uncle and partner said a lot. My only suggestion (I don’t know if you have enough words) would be to make a smoother transition into the last paragraph about the party. But great job overall!

    Like

    • Thanks for reading and commenting. I’m glad you enjoyed this piece. That last paragraph isn’t sitting well with me…feels disjointed from the rest of the story and a little soppy . Thanks for mentioning about working on a smoother transition. Hopefully I can do just that.
      Till next time, Ellespeth

      Liked by 1 person

    • Yes. Perhaps this sort of experience might be easier now, than a decade or so ago. I still think it would be difficult but…more of a support system within a loving circle. Thank you for reading this piece and for wondering with me.
      Ellespeth

      Liked by 1 person

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